Stocks Plunge As Traders Realize It’s Monday And They Have To Go To Work

NEW YORK—In what experts are calling an economic downturn that could deliver shocks to markets for months to come, stocks plunged Monday as traders realized it was the beginning of the week and that they had to go to work. “Today, the Dow Jones industrial average sunk over 900 points after investors across the nation…

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The Onion 

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