{"id":1039,"date":"2023-01-13T11:15:00","date_gmt":"2023-01-13T11:15:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/2023\/01\/13\/nursing-home-keeps-elderly-residents-active-by-shooting-at-their-feet\/"},"modified":"2023-01-13T11:15:00","modified_gmt":"2023-01-13T11:15:00","slug":"nursing-home-keeps-elderly-residents-active-by-shooting-at-their-feet","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/2023\/01\/13\/nursing-home-keeps-elderly-residents-active-by-shooting-at-their-feet\/","title":{"rendered":"Nursing Home Keeps Elderly Residents Active By Shooting At Their Feet"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>WAVERLY, NE\u2014Laughing uproariously as they watched the aging, often handicapped seniors dance, staff members at local nursing home Heartland Care Facility told reporters Friday that the best way to keep elderly residents active was to grab a gun and start shooting at their feet. \u201cOnce they reach their 80s, traditional\u2026<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.theonion.com\/nursing-home-keeps-elderly-residents-active-by-shooting-1849876412\">Read more&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n<p>The Onion\u00a0<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>WAVERLY, NE\u2014Laughing uproariously as they watched the aging, often handicapped seniors dance, staff members at local nursing home Heartland Care Facility told reporters Friday that the best way to keep elderly residents active was to grab a gun and start shooting at their feet. \u201cOnce they reach their 80s, traditional\u2026 Read more&#8230; The Onion\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":1040,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1039","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/b0d4e90e6f5d571c2fd57d8f96e65381-n4iN90.jpeg","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1039"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1039"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1039\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1040"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1039"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1039"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loonregistrar.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1039"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}