“My dad and I having a drink in 1985. We’re Irish and German so a little drink here and there is no big deal.” (submitted by Amanda) The post Lil’ Chaser appeared first on AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com. AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com
Lil’ Chaser
Christmas With Anne Geddes
“My wife was attempting to copy an Anne Geddes photo for our Christmas card.” (submitted by Mike) The post Christmas With Anne Geddes appeared first on AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com. AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com
Lies Fitness Trainers Tell Their Clients All The Time
Read more… The Onion
Vatican Funeral Ends With Ritual Eating Of Pope Benedict’s Body
VATICAN CITY—In a requiem mass that followed strict liturgical protocol for a deceased head of the Roman Catholic Church, the funeral of Pope Benedict XVI reportedly concluded Thursday with the ritual eating of the former pontiff’s body. “Father, into your hands I commend his spirit, as we commend to our stomachs his… Read more… The […]
Incredibly Productive House Of Representatives Assembles For 8th Vote In Just 3 Days
WASHINGTON—Defying speculation that the 118th Congress would get little accomplished during its term, the incredibly productive House of Representatives assembled Thursday for its eighth vote in just three days. “Less than 72 hours into the new session, and they’ve already held seven votes—these committed… Read more… The Onion
Onion Sports’ NFL Week 18 Picks
Onion Sports shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in the NFL’s week 18 games. Read more… The Onion
How The House Speaker Is Elected
With a group of Republicans holding out against the candidacy of Rep. Kevin McCarthy, the election of a new House speaker has hit a stalemate, and the House cannot begin business until a speaker is chosen. The Onion takes a step-by-step look at how the speaker of the House is elected. Read more… The Onion
Decoding Teens’ Semaphore Messages: The Surprising Double Meanings Behind Common Flag-Wavings
Read more… The Onion
Ways I Imagined I Might Die When I Was a Kid
I’m told to eat my vegetables. I eat watermelon instead, and swallow a seed by accident. A watermelon grows inside of me, crushing my organs. I walk to school and can’t fight my urge to run across the street a bunch of times without looking both ways. I’m entirely unharmed by passing cars but my […]
Nation’s Children Of Alcoholics Figure They Might As Well Get Really Good At Pool
AKRON, OH—During a press conference in which they described the game as the best option available for passing the long hours their parents spent drinking at bars, children of the nation’s alcoholics announced Thursday that they might as well get really good at pool. “Our moms and dads just ordered their fourth round,… Read more… […]