The Budget for My Big-Budget Movie

Two A-list celebrities willing to pretend that they’re real-life friends: $40 million Intro animations for 11 different production companies: $650,000 each Physics accuracy consultant with at least one Nobel Prize: $120,000 Boat chase scene where the characters drive vertically up a waterfall: $5.1 million Ping-pong balls: 4 for $7.99 (x50) Auto-stabilizing camera gimbal: $153,000 Authentic, […]

A Hearty Fuck You from Cream of Tartar

Don’t pretend you can’t see me at the back of the spice rack. You’re the one who banished me to this infinite hellscape of longing and despair. At least have the decency to acknowledge my presence before you reject me. I was considered essential a hundred years ago, but now I’m hidden behind the other […]

New Year’s Eve Party

 Read More 

Andy Cohen Drunkenly Hosts Other Holidays

“We will be back, and we will be drunk.” — Andy Cohen, upon hearing that CNN banned on-air drinking during its 2023 New Year’s Eve festivities This year, CNN banned anchors from imbibing on New Year’s Eve. Fortunately for longtime host Andy Cohen, the network didn’t say anything about getting sloshed during other holiday celebrations. […]

Awkwardly Posing Models: This Doesn’t Look Comfortable

Some people just try too hard and end up looking ridiculous. Beauty is pain, but this is torture. Scroll down to see some of the weirdest approaches to modelling ever. The post Awkwardly Posing Models: This Doesn’t Look Comfortable first appeared on Sad and Useless Humor.Read More 

Line a Plucky Supporting Character Might Say in a ’90s Movie About an Underdog Sports Team, or Lottery Slogan?

Believe in something bigger. Today could be the day. Hey, you never know. Imagine the possibilities. Winners happen! Just imagine! Ehh, it could happen. Give your dreams a chance! Dream big. Win big. Gotta be in it to win it. Get in the game! You can’t win if you don’t play. Don’t let the big […]

The Best Outfit for Your Star Sign According to Your Puritan Astrologer

Aries Don’t be too quick to put away thine winter woolens. A late frost will spoil the newly sown seeds; don’t let the poisoned crops spoil thine robust health as well. The number 6 will be a significant number for you this year. But for now, at least, you have eight children. Taurus Feeling whimsical? […]

L6 Lagrange Point

 Read More 

Your Bar Trivia Host Lays Down Some Ground Rules

Hi! Welcome to Millie’s Bar and Grill. Tonight we’re kicking off our biweekly trivia tournament. Before we get things started, I’d like to set some ground rules. First and foremost: if you aren’t planning to take this seriously, please withdraw from participating immediately and disband your team. This is not a game—if you joined this […]

Eyebombing Community Puts Googly Eyes On Everything

What is one thing on this planet that can make anything better? According to members of r/Eyebombing subreddit, googly eyes is the correct answer. Eyebombing is a humorous trend of sticking googly eyes on random objects to essentially make them come to life. If you wish to get involved into this movement, you can get […]