Mattel Confirms That Animated Version Of Barney Still Has Man Inside
EL SEGUNDO, CA—In an effort to stay as faithful to the original character as possible, Mattel confirmed Monday that the animated Barney in their upcoming reboot would…
Biden Announces Nation Can Stay Up Till 9:30 Tonight
WASHINGTON—Sighing as he gave in to the demands of all 330 million Americans, President Joe Biden announced Monday that the nation could stay up until 9:30 p.m….
What Fox News Anchors Said Privately About Trump’s Election Lies
Even as Fox News anchors peddled lies about the 2020 election, newly revealed text messages reveal they privately mocked the 45th president and his false claims. According…
One In 8 Americans Over 50 Addicted To Highly Processed Foods
A new poll found that one in eight adults between the ages of 50 and 80 reported signs of addiction to highly processed foods, with symptoms including…
Problematic Friend Argues That Kanye Makes Some Good Points About Shoes
CHICAGO—Causing everyone in the conversation to feel awkward about his concerning statements, sources confirmed Monday that their problematic friend began arguing that controversial rapper and designer Kanye…
Chonky Cats Showing Their Adorable Double Chins
Chonky cats with double chins are like a meme that’s come to life. They’re adorable and funny at the same time. When you watch them wobbling across…
Balls Replaced With Cats In Sports Photos
Admit it – this is the greatest pointless thing on the internet you have seen this year. If it isn’t, please tell us about something dumber in…
3D Animal Car Window Decals: Fun Way To Ruin Rear Visibility
Have you ever wished that pigs, dogs, cows, etc. started busting out the back of your car window? Are you sick and tired of the great rear…
Week In Review: February 26, 2023
It Is Journalism’s Sacred Duty To Endanger The Lives Of As Many Trans People As Possible Read more… The Onion