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Presidential Motorcade Stops To Pick Up Blood-Soaked Hitchhiker
WASHINGTON—After a vagrant emerged from the darkness along the highway and beckoned toward the vehicles with his wickedly sharp blade, President Joe Biden directed his motorcade to…
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We’re Your Caramels from Three Christmases Ago, and It’s Very Unclear If We’re Still Good
Hey, Cowboy! Haven’t seen you for a long time! We were getting a little worried there for a bit, thinking you might have forgotten about us. Haha….
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Study Suggests Chimpanzees Also Go Through Menopause
A study published in Science which tracked the hormone levels of 185 female chimpanzees suggests that our closest DNA relatives also go through menopause, a rare condition…
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Scientists Train Full-Grown Man To Ask For Help When Needed
STANFORD, CA—In a cutting-edge breakthrough for their field, psychologists at Stanford University confirmed Thursday they had trained a full-grown man to ask for help when he needed…
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Thrifter Strikes Gold With Vintage Amazon Essentials Jacket From 2021
NASHUA, NH—Looking over his shoulder to make sure no one else copped his find, local thrifter Brian Gresbaum told reporters Thursday he had struck gold with a…