Nation’s Aunts Announce It Must Be Nice Not Having To Worry About Money Like The Rest Of Us
ROCHESTER, NY—Addressing all of their family members who kept name-brand groceries in their fridge without a Sam’s Club membership, the nation’s aunts announced Tuesday that it must…
Professors Explain Why They Are Fleeing Florida
Thanks to Gov. Ron DeSantis’ so-called ‘war on woke,’ Florida institutions of higher education have experienced an unprecedented brain drain. The Onion asked professors why they are…
You Don’t Have To Buy This House, Just Talk To Me
Interested “buyers” stop by any time Thursday after 7 p.m. or Sunday afternoon. Must be prepared to be trapped for several hours. Read more… The Onion
The Funniest Single-Panel Comics by David Ostow (Part 2)
David Ostow is a brilliant cartoonist that we have previously featured in Part 1 collection of single-panel comics. His work has also been published in The New…
Funny New Year’s Resolutions: Realistic And Achievable
Finally! Resolutions that you can actually achieve! No more unrealistic goals like working out or give up smoking! Pick any resolution from this list of funny new…
Ok, Buddy, Now You’ve Really Gone and Done It
What did you just say to me? Ok, that’s it. Now you’ve really gone and done it. I’m sorry, but that was the last straw. I tried…
5 Gray Wolves Released In Colorado In Effort To Restore Population
In a move that reignited tensions between conservationists who advocate for a balanced ecosystem and livestock farmers who see the new additions as a threat, five gray…
Biden Addresses Nation While Hanging From Branch On Side Of Cliff
WASHINGTON—Using his platform to plead for Americans to lend him a hand, President Joe Biden addressed the nation Monday while hanging from a branch on the side…
Child’s Diary Completely Devoid Of Any Useful Dirt On Other Parent
HUNTINGTON BEACH, CA—Sighing as she shoved the journal back under their daughter’s mattress, local woman Lori Trent reported Monday that her child’s diary was completely devoid of…