‘I Am Your New King,’ Says Bloody, Cancerous Polyp To British Public

LONDON—Proclaiming a new era of unstoppable proliferation across the United Kingdom, a bloody, cancerous polyp addressed the British public from Buckingham Palace on Tuesday and informed them that he was their new king. “Bow down before me, subjects, for I have dethroned your once-mighty monarch,” said His Majesty…

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The Onion 

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