Attention-Seeking Friend Obviously Hoping Someone Will Ask Where Other Arm Went

CHAMPAIGN, IL—As she struggled to pull open the café door with an armful of books, friends of local woman Fela Torres reported Wednesday that the drama queen was, as usual, seeking everyone’s attention and obviously hoping the sad display would lead to one of them asking where her other arm went. “Oh Lord, I wonder…

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The Onion 

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